so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I just gargled with NyQuil
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
