She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
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