yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
