Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Randomize
