You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
