Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
