i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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