he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
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