I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
