She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
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