Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
