Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
there is puke in my bra ... again
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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