We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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