I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
