This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
