we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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