seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
