The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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