Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
