you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
