Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
My bed smells like the plague
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
