love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
im holly from the hills drunk
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
