If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
We're not piercing ourselves today.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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