i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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