this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
NoShamevember. You game?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
