I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Randomize
