FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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