I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
