Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
