I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
