yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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