Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
