Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
My bed smells like the plague
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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