Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
