new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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