The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
