you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I will pee on everything he values.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize
