Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
