Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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