I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
