Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
worst night to have a conscience
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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