I'm gonna have a badass scar
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
