it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
