Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
