Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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