on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
