we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
