I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
