talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize