I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Randomize
